woohs, not happy with PEOPLE again. haha nvm, i shall go chant.
Thank you gohonzon =)
xx signed off at 11:00 PM
Sunday, October 11, 2009
today, while i am trying to browse through my previous assignment for some ideas on what to write for this assignment. i came across this assignment which i open and to my SURPRISE! i did the format of the whole assignment wrongly. I hope i wont be penalize too much for that! GOSH! it's not as if this is the first assignment and i made this mistake. The instructions is stated CLEARLY in the book! YUCKS! for moment, i felt bad!
NOW, I WILL TAKE EXTRA NOTE ON THAT! Though it's 10%, but it meant alot to me, BECAUSE, this assignment is already done actrociosly! and the other 10% was done EQUALLY lousy, hope the grp assignment can pull the grade up! EXAMS - can't do much.
Guess i am just now a study person. i paid my own hard earned money / see people face money to go study and YET i am not working hard! when can i feel the urge and the pain to work hard and do something for myself?
My report and requirement for this new assignment is 6 pages! I am not even one page DONE and yet i am surfing facebook and blogging here. Definately no idea on what to write. How much i dislike last min work! and yet i made the same mistake again!
I really hope i will work harder and buck up! because i really want to do something and achieve something for myself!
on a lighter note, i went to zhiwei bdae with some primary school mate. It's a good time seeing sihui, rebecca (super long didn see her), xavier, fangyi, carina (tho i don't rem her), Jason (Jakkie) haha, anyway. DARYL reli live in A BIG BIG HOUSE! there's gohonzon in the house too, tho he's not a member/beliver. his mother is. wow, it's a super rich, well to do family. 4 levels, LEVEL 3 is his room and a pool table at level 4. so many medals won by him in his room. REALLY GOOD! sometimes when you say the world is fair, it reli isnt reli that fair. such as himself. i think he got the l00ks, got the money, got the smartness and hardworking. haha, sounds like sour grape.
we left at about 10 plus and waited for the bus for rather long time and we all head home. i think for a party, we reached early, but he live in sbw only ma, haha so faster lo. poor rebecca who stay at clementi.
alright forget to mention weird weird came to l00k for me a while before i head for the party. he's pro, cos the moment he come my house, he shit! DOTZ! that's the moment when i feel bad over the mistake of the format of the assignment -_-" and i want to talk to him abt it. He stayed in for 15mins. that's the reason why i always say, when i need someone around, the person wont be there AND what's worst? I CANNOT BLAME HIM BECAUSE IT'S NOT HIS FAULT! ARGHS! HAHAHA!
okay on the other hand, when i shouted for comb, watch, handphone, this and that. he is able to always find for me! =))). being taken care of is a nice feeling =))
actually it's very nice when someone always call you and make you feel that you are so worthful to talk to when he sounds excited.
OKAY! back to my assignment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PAINFUL RUSHING!!
xx signed off at 12:40 AM
Monday, October 05, 2009
Maybe just a short entry and i will proceed on to my work. (hopefully).
Anyway, 2day is the submission of 2 assignments! YIPPIE! Means i am left with 2, YES still 2 more. While others are done, now relaxing or perhaps trying hard to work on and edit the done assignment, i am over here struggling on how to write on my new assignment and compiling the group work which include my halfly done work. But i am not comparing, because this is how i work, ultimately, i deserve to be punished to starting later than other people and putting in less effort than others. Still ,I am glad that my grp mates are very helpful and they offer to help each other out.
2day i started another round of whining and complaining in msn that gets me nowhere. i realise even if nothing happens to me, i will complain about other people, finding all their past to talk about. EVEN if it happens several years ago. So after ALL, it's really my problem, my fault. What if people now still talk about what happens to me when i am 8 years old? Will i like it?
So i conclude, i wont promise to say today is the last time i will complain about pple, but i will remind myself, there are actually better things to do out there than complaining :)
However, it's really hard to get over the feeling of dislike towards people esp if you need to face that person almost everyday. I will get my feeling to neutral and try very very hard to forget about whatever things that happens. Why did i not want to forget is because i do not want to fall for the trap again. Whenever she is nice to me, i feel so overjoyed and after when she vent her fustration on me, i am tarnised. I don't want that to happen to my life.
I am who i am, i lead my own life. i have the freedom to love and hate. i chose love. I shouldn't be afraid of anything that i do and in order to achieve that, i need to be strong in character.
I will chant for the wisdom and good fortune and will stay focus in work and sch work. I am determine to overcome the procastinating feeling, tho i got the urge to do some facebooking right now at this very moment.
If only ideas for assignment can flows like how i am writing now, i would have achieved lots of work done.
Done with the entry, finally, i enjoyed typing very much!
Mommy is going oversea soon, the mommy girl goanna miss her, miss her food, nobody take care of the mommy girl =( the mommy girl cramps is approaching. Count down to nasty cramp starts now!
GOSH! pray hard the pain go away and never come back!
